Raven's Elusive Self-Confidence

 All of my life, ever since I was a child, I've lacked self-confidence and self-esteem. I never felt like I was good enough. Why? Certain family members, for one thing. They never seemed to believe in me. My mother was so controlling that I rarely got to make decisions for myself. Some of my other relatives were just as bad for my self-esteem. Nothing I did seemed good enough. Or, at least, that's how it came across to me.

For another thing, the other kids at school. I never fit in with any of my classmates. I was the one who was made fun of, teased for any little thing. I was always picked on. They never gave me a chance. Knowing what I know now, I wish I could live that time over again and be a different person. I would just be quiet. I wouldn't say anything stupid. I would just... I don't know. But I wouldn't be the "me" that was. 

This has spilled over into my adult life. I still feel like the misfit. I haven't talked to any of my family in years. I don't want to talk to some of them... The ones who made me feel inferior and incapable of making correct decisions. They never believed in me. They thought they knew how I should live my life. And I was doing it wrong.

Is it any wonder that I have no self-esteem or self-confidence? I was never taught to believe in myself. 

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