Allow Me to Re-Introduce Myself

Please call me Raven.

I've been through a lot these past few years, most of it hell. And, without going into the long sordid details, let me just say that I have lost my sense of self. I'm not sure who I am anymore, although I know that I'm not the person I used to be. I need to find out who I am now. 

Who am I?

I grew up having Catholicism forced upon me. I went to a very small, private parochial school for 12 years, and I hated every minute of it. When I went away to college I discovered my real Path, my Calling. I am a Pagan. And I am a Witch. Has this Path been easy for me? The short answer is no. I have had no real guidance aside from books and websites. After all these years I still believe myself to be a novice. I have so much more to learn. Am I sure that this is the right Path for me? Absolutely. Novice or not, my beliefs here are very strong. I know what I believe. 

I know that I am Goth, although I wasn't always aware of this. I never dressed the part growing up. I never had the appropriate wardrobe. But I have the mindset. I'm drawn to the darker side of things. I love the dark, the strange, the unusual, sometimes the macabre. I've long said that I should have been an Addams. Admittedly, I've held myself back. I blame my family for this. From childhood it was drilled into my head "What would the neighbors think?" So I ended up worrying too much about other people's opinions. I've finally reached a point, though, where other people don't really matter. I'm going to be "me". I'm going to dress how I please, do my makeup as I please and dye my hair whatever color I please. (The plan is to dye my hair purple as soon as I can find a good salon in my area.) My health is not the best, and I'm determined to be "me" before I lose the chance.

Who else, or what else, am I? That remains to be seen. I'm still discovering things about myself. This is not going to be as easy as I would like. I have issues with self-esteem, self-confidence, insecurity. I will have problems from time to time, unfortunately. 

This is where I'm at, finding out more about myself and becoming the "me" that I was meant to be. Welcome to my journey of self-discovery.

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